Helpful Hints

I’m a Virgo which basically means I like to be helpful, busy and active – probably why I’ve struggled so much to adjust to my enforced desperate housewife lifestyle. Virgos are also supposed to be charming, witty and loyal so whilst I take some time out to assemble some charming witty ramblings about our recent trip to the East Coast, here’s some more of my personal tips and advice on coping with life in America. It’s an in-built need, I just can’t help myself….

Shoe sizes – two sizes bigger than than UK sizes and several times smaller than European.  For example I was a size 5 in the UK and am now a size 7 in the US.  That’s a 38 in European.

Dress sizes – two sizes smaller than in the UK so I’m now a 4 or a 6, depending how much dinner I’ve eaten.  That’s 34 or 36 in European – which does rather tie in with the 38 shoes. 

I rather like the idea of wearing size 4 clothes because that makes me feel somewhat petite, on the other hand I don’t like the idea of size 7 shoes – that’s enormous! The American sizing system classifies me as some kind of Hobbit.

Bodyweight is always assessed in pounds (lbs) – a stone is something you find lying around on a beach.  Nobody will have a clue what you are talking about if you give your weight in stones – or kilo’s for that matter.  My daughter’s classmates have no idea what the metric system is, even though apparently it is the official system of measuring in the US.  At school she learns everything in feet and inches and all the road signs are in miles – not kilometers.  Also Americans do not understand the 24 hour clock – that's  "military time" over here.

A US gallon is smaller than a UK gallon; a US gallon of petrol is also way cheaper.

Voltage – whilst most of Europe runs on 220 V, the US runs on 110.  Apparently this is because it is thought to be safer.  Whilst this may be reassuring if you are an  electro-phobe, to the rest of us it just means everything is decidedly slow.  Back in the UK I have an electric kettle that has boiled before I can get the cups out of the cupboard and the tea bags in place, here I take a shower and get fully dressed whilst the water boils.  Similarly you wont get blown away by a fast and furious hairdryer.

And talking of hair – in the UK I have a fringe.  Here I have “bangs”. No I don’t get that one either.

For those who like cooking cornflour is cornstarch; plain flour is all purpose and icing sugar either powdered or confectioner’s.  Butter comes in packs of 4 oz sticks – very useful – but quantities in recipes are always given in cups – full cups, half a cup, third of a cup.  If you plan on doing any cooking you will need to invest in a set of “cups”.  Whilst this does eliminate the need for scales and is very handy when you’re cooking with a five year old,  I personally don’t see anything wrong with broadening the mind and using weights and measures. After all when you’ve just given birth nobody assesses the baby’s weight by guessing how many cups it’ll fit into.

And talking of birth, there is little or no maternity leave and definitely no paternity leave although adoption is extremely common – especially if you are wealthy or Angelina Jolie.

For those of us who like to smell nice when it comes to deodorant you are stuck with a roll-on, body spray and spray deodorant for women are inexplicably unavailable. Whilst at first I thought this was an admirable attempt to save the ozone layer, it's obviously not because you can buy aerosols for men.

And finally, for those of you still under the delusion that LA is the height of sophistication and all things modern “Express Parking” (ie you pay at an automatic machine before you go back to your car rather than paying the man on the exit gate) has only just arrived in Pasadena and so has tomato puree in a tube – recently launched  at my local Fresh and Easy and previously only available in a tin.  Wonders will never cease. What will they come up with next? Spray deodorant for women hopefully.